The Scourge of The Professional American Pastor: Part 1 - Mainline

I doubt that anything has hurt the American Church more than the development of the professional pastor. I should know because that is precisely what I was for many years.

I received my professional degree from an accredited seminary that told me and everyone else; that I mastered God.

I was ordained in a branded not-for-profit corporation which gave me exclusive rights to run my own local franchise complete with logos, corporate support, and franchise fees called “apportionments.”

These fees go to pay the salaries of religious administrators who are as helpful and relevant as their secular political counterparts. They are super-professional pastors, so to speak. Their theology is so radical and out of touch with the people of the pew that the only thing that can be done with them is to put them in high positions of ecclesiastical power where they can do less actual damage than when they were pastoring a local franchise.

They promised me upward mobility, a guaranteed salary complete with a house, insurance, and a healthy pension. If I behaved myself and grew my local franchise, they promised me bigger and better franchises along with the higher salary and prestige they afford.

And if I was really successful, I had the possibility of becoming a CEO of sorts, overseeing several franchise holders at once, maybe even receiving the highest honor by being elected into an exclusive club and given the title of “bishop.”

If I had persisted, I would easily have had a several million in my pension account by now.

When I die, they would have eulogized me and placed my picture in the gallery, and used me as an example for all future aspiring professional pastors still wet behind the ears but with great dreams of climbing the 501c3 corporate ladder just like me.

Now wouldn’t that have been grand? All that this would have cost me was my soul. Professional pastors consider this a bargain.

Welcome to the world of the mainline American professional pastor and the demise of the American Church.